Kim's Game

My Name Is Laura, But There's So Much More To Find Out

I have discovered my name is Laura Regent.  I'm Laura.  Call me Laura!

This is fantastic.  It's like being reborn. This is my real name.  Even if no-one has called me that yet.  I long for the day when someone comes up to me and calls me Laura.

I know all this because my sister Kim has written in.  And maybe that's why I chose the name 'Kim' - some distant memory of her, not because of the game.  I wish I could picture her - I can't, not yet - but she mentions the blue leaky roof and that does start to open something up.  Whenever the rain started, we used to go and get that old German helmet from Dad's den, right?, and sit watching the drops plop in.  And then we'd wait to see how mad Dad was when he got back and giggle while he'd tell us how his Daddy brought it back from Arnhem and....

But he was your Dad, wasn't he?  Not mine.  What happened to mine?  And if your Dad gets your letter, maybe he'll come on the blog, tell me more.

The problem is that Kim tells me that I left home in 2004 and cut myself off from her and our mother and everyone.  She doesn't know where I've been for three years, just that I was searching for something or someone and had a boyfriend (she thinks) helping me. And it means that the woman they rang on Outlook is my mother.  I am going to have to see if I can find her, speak to her, see what she knows.  But if you're there, reading this blog, Mum, please will you come online, tell me what you know about where I've been.  You said something about my father as well - my real father - said he was 'trash'.  Why did you say that?  And if Regent is my stepfather's name, what's my real name, my birth name.  Please tell me. Please.

The only person who has definitely seen me since 2004 is Em who saw me in Paris, in a taxi, outside the Louvre.  And someone who had been showing people that photo of mine was calling after me, shouting the name 'Nicky'.  Was that my name then?  Was that short for Dominique?  Or is there someone else called Nicky?  Could it be the N who left me that note - if it wasn't Jonathan?

No, I'm not going to get confused and disheartened again.  I am Laura.  I know that for sure.  Others things will now slot into place.  Other people will know me.  Please, if you do, post something here.

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere

The Friday Meeting

So I waited outside Holborn Tube Station.  And then 'N' turned up.  Well, he says that's his nickname - it turned out to be Jonathan my godfather.  He seemed nice to begin with.  And a cute dog.  He told me my name is Laura.  But then Helen- no big surprise - also turned up.  And she told me not to trust him.   She said my name is Dominique. But why should I trust her? She didn't have any answers for all the questions I had for her.  In the end I didn't know who to trust, didn't feel safe with either of them. 

I had a sound engineer from the BBC with me (like Em suggested). Listen here to exactly what happened.

I managed to get away from both of them.  Maybe it was a mistake.  But neither of them could prove anything.  Everything Jonathan talked about he could have memorised from this blog - like Katy and Nicolas and Paris. Everything Helen said could have come from the blog too....

At least one of them is lying.

I spent that night in a cafe at Liverpool Street Station.  It got pretty cold.  And miserable.  Every time I seem to take a step forward, I am pushed back.

And then I thought I would go back and check the mail box.  I'm not sure why - it's like the only place I have left.  And inside I found another letter from Jonathan (or N or whoever he is).  It said "Contact me when you feel ready"  He gave me his email address.  And also in the envelope was £300.

Whether he's my friend or not, I needed that money.  I checked into a hotel, had a hot bath and went to sleep in a bed for the first time in three days.  I slept on and off till today.

I thought I should post this, let you know what was happening. 

Now I'm going to look through and see what else people have added, what new clues I have to follow...

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere

Still Anxious, Still Trying to Work It All Out

I'm in an internet cafe a long way from Helen's place.  I'm starting to feel a bit safer.  If I can just get a few things worked out, I might go the BBC tomorrow to be on the programme one last time.

How on earth does Helen know that man?  ...I don't know who she is! Or what she wants from me.

And then there's the meeting at Holborn tomorrow.  Orion wants me to meet him at Gerrard's Cross at 4pm but I have to go to Holborn.  Someone who knows me - N - wants me to be there.  N knew I would have that key so I must have told N about the mailbox.  I have to do what N asks. Whoever he or she turns out to be. Sorry Orion.

All the same, Em is telling me to be careful at this meeting and she's right: Trixie warned me about a man who's angry enough to kill me and she's right when she says someone lured me to that mailbox.  Exactly who is Geoff?   Is he on my side or not?

Meanwhile Anna is telling me not to trust her sister, that there is clearly some sort of story to tell and I am wrong to believe anything she says.  And now I know that's true. She's been keeping a huge secret from me. Should I trust Anna more than Helen?

I have nowhere to go and no-one to turn to.  If I don't go to the BBC, if I don't go to Holborn, I'll have nothing.  I have to go.  I have to.

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

I Have Discovered Something About Helen

The Reporter posted a comment when I didn't arrive to record my last studio session today:

I've had to leave the house.  I just grabbed my jacket and ran.  It's not safe for me there. I am writing this from an internet cafe.

That's why I was too scared to go the BBC - what if Helen is waiting for me there? 

I've just discovered that she knows something about me but hasn't told me. Why do that?  What's going on?  I'm so confused, so scared. 

I'll try and post again soon and I'll try to read what everyone else has been suggesting.  I can't sit here any longer.  I have to keep moving.

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

French Connection

Jonathan says he thinks he might be my godfather and I was with him in Normandy.  Katy knows me from Paris in 2005. And Em thinks she met me when I was approaching people with a photograph outside The Louvre in Paris.  It feels like I have definitely been in France at some stage.  So has anyone else met someone like me in France?  Katy, did you ever meet Jonathan?  Em, did the woman you met mention anyone else in France?  Jonathan, do you recognise the people in the photo?  And why do you think she disappeared so suddenly from that lunch?

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

The Email

Peter wrote:

You are my woman and I am the man in the picture standing in front of a church....all came crashing down on you after you read my email....

Helen is worried you might be trying to take advantage of me.  So I have to ask: what was in that email? Can you send me a copy to this site?

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

Did You See Me In Paris?

Em says she saw a woman in Paris, showing people a photograph – the one of the couple – trying to trace them, that she had to find them. If this was me, when was this? Did anyone else see this woman with the photo or talk to her? Did anyone else notice what she saw that made her jump into that taxi so suddenly – who was in that other taxi that she needed to follow?  If this was me, it could be a huge step forward. Or even if it was someone else - if someone else is trying to trace the same people - it would help.  Did anyone else hear who I said these people were? Please tell me if you saw anything.

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

Where Have I Been For Three Years?

Kim Regent wrote:

You'd had a screaming row with Mum.... probably over that boy you were seeing.
You'd said you'd leave the house for good in October 2004. You walked right back out the door.  Oh, God, I've been sorry these last few years that I haven't seen you.
Do you think you could be Laura Regent, my half-sister, disappeared three years ago from suburban Washington?

Maybe it isn’t chance that made me choose my name.  Kim, when you say we could be half-sisters, how are we related?  And where are you from? Please listen to my radio interview, do I have the same accent as you?

Julia thought she recognised my voice:

I'm almost certain you're the woman from Haiti, Dominique Leclerc, who married my father-in-law. You're an educated Haitian from a family who once had money...You married my elderly father-in-law in a hush-hush ceremony in London just two months ago. You convinced him you were in love with him. When we offered you a very generous cash deal to leave the country and never come back, you jumped at it. Maybe your brother, who is even greedier than you are, decided the money offered wasn't enough.

Can I be Laura and Dominique? Could I really be the sort of person who would do what Dominique has done?  Maybe that boyfriend from Washington is the man Julia thinks is my brother.  When I look in the mirror, I wonder if I could be from Haiti.  This story fits with Geoff, who saw someone who could be me hiding something in a bank here in London. Did anyone see me near the bank?

So many possibilities. So many sad stories. Are they some of them connected somehow? They can't all be me.... ...can they?

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.

On The Plane

I've just been out to the fast-food place on the corner and got a burger and it did taste weird. Lois thinks she saw me on a plane.  What she remembers is that I was eating the vegetarian option. Was that me on that plane? Have I even forgotten that I am a vegetarian? It almost makes me laugh.

And this fits with what Samantha said – she thinks we were working together at a resort in Jamaica and

the dapper English gentleman staying in Room 237 spirited you away with him to London and that perhaps a dose of sleep medication taken on the overseas flight may have destroyed your memory.

But who is this man, what's his name? Where is he now? Did we have some sort of fight?  Is that how I lost my memory?

By posting a comment below, you agree with the terms which allow the BBC to use your contribution here, on-air or elsewhere.